First, a short run down on why I haven't updated in a while.
* I was working part time at a real estate agency, one where my sister works. It was suppossed to be every second Saturday and Thursday afternoons, but ended up being more than that through filling in for other people. It was good, if not tiring, and somewhat irritating, but the spare cash was excellent. That all went balls up a couple of weeks ago, when I was *no longer needed*. There were fights all round between other staff, and the end result is now that the office is closing.
* All the above given, plus other news, means my sister is now moving to Townsville soon. I've been giving her what help I can - which, has been woefully little, and I feel bad about it.
* We (well, I) have been delivering and picking up catalogues for a while, putting in orders and the like. It was decided to give it bash and see how it went, after we were told it was not even ten hours work a week, you put 200 catalogues out, you pick up 200 catalogues, you get 20% of the orders. Sweet. As it turned out, for me anyways, it was more like 15 - 20 hours a week, when you count dropping off catalogues, going back to pick them up, finding out half of them weren't left out, leaving notes saying you would be back next day, going back next day, collating the orders, filling out the order forms, keeping track of what orders you had, what came in, what didn't, delivering orders, taking money, working out money and your cut etc etc etc. Not to mention the walking (of which we are talking 2-3 hours a day) really aggravated the sciatica I have been experiencing, and you get one very tired, very annoyed and very sore pregnant woman. We put in our last order on Saturday and won't be doing it anymore.
So yes. Thats why I haven't had time to update, but things should be better now. I'll miss the spare cash I received from both the catalogues and the real estate agency, and I will miss it sorely, but neither worked out, and that, I suppose, is just life. And now for some random observations by way of update.
* I am not a touchy feely person. I don't like being hugged or kissed by just anyone. I don't even like people standing close to me. I am essentially, an aloof person when face to face, unless I know the person to whom I am speaking partiuclarly well. For a time there, I really felt as if I was *missing out* on something with my inability to be affectionate towards people who weren't very close to me, and I tried, sincerely, very hard, to be the huggy kissy type. That failed, so then I tried to at least be *receptive* to the huggy kissy thing. That didn't work either. So now, I have come to the conclusion that it is just who I am. I enjoy hugs and kisses from M of course, and give him hugs and kisses all the time. But even my closest friends I will not initiate a hug with. I will take one, if offerred, with a minimum of fuss, but never intiate it. I am the same with my family, with the exception of my neices and nephews. I hug them and slobber on them all the time, but other than that, it's just M really. I have theories as to why I'm like that, but the fact remains that my affection seems to be solely reserved for M and kids. And thats it. So you can imagine precisely how well I am coping with this constant need complete strangers at the supermarket or servo, or whatever, feel - to touch my belly. I now can recognise the glint in someones eye that means they are going to reach out and give me a buddha like rub, and I have perfected the art of being able to get my hands in between theirs and my belly faster than they eye can blink. I don't mind overly much when someone I know does it - family, friends or whatever - but I do kinda pity in some ways, the complete stranger at the service station, who put his hands on my belly even after I moved them away, who then got a very loud burst of "Hey fella! *personal space* is more than just an IDEA when it comes to me and my baby OK?"
* May I just say, for winter, the weather here has been awesome the last few days? Sure, it has barely gotten over 16, but there has been minimum wind, and plenty of sun, and well - it's just been gorgeous.
* Spidermonkey is one active little child. The kicks are huge, and the rolls and flips are massive too. I have reached a stage now where I can see my belly jump when it kicks, and I have to say I am enjoying every last minute of it. Even the midnight to three am routine martial arts practise sessions. It seems to have learned there is a fun new place to kick or jump in there, which causes an instantaneous reaction from mum, because it feels like she has just been stabbed in the genitals, and she is likely to lose complete body functions from the crotch down. And I have learned recently that it is a bad idea to stand between me and biscuits / creambuns / cakes / dessert of any kind. This is obviously not my own doing but rather spidermonkeys, because generally, as a rule, I don't go in for sweet things. I much prefer bitter or savoury. These days though, dessert is the major portion of any meal, and it's always good to keep a bottle of sparkling apple juice and a Europe Sesame Bar on hand - those things are the absolute BOMB at the moment.
* Despite the above reference to desserts, I'm now going to sicken everyone by saying that I haven't really put on weight. Spidermonkey has, is the right size for dates, is growing well, and my belly is certainly getting to be out there, but I have lost weight everywhere else, and am now resembling as someone said the other day *a beach ball on sticks* on comparison to my former self. Of course, this weight loss everywhere else could be due to all the walking I was doing with the catalogues, so perhaps I can expect to get more bovine like from here on in.
And thats it really. All is good in our land, I am feeling well, particularly on the nights that I manage to get a decent sleep (like last night - no stressing about havign to get up and go out to pick up catalogues - yay!), M is well, and spidermonkey is well also. I am very spun out by the fact that I am now over halfway through the pregnancy. If the babe was born now (god forbid) it would have a chance of survival. A small chance yes, but more of a chance than it's big sister had. There really is a little person in there, who's personality is coming through more every day. I feel so blessed.
23 weeks & 4 days
